ephesians 432

In the bible, Jesus gives us explicit instructions on what to do regarding forgiving others.  Matthew 18:21-22 says “21 Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?” 22 Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.”

In blended families, forgiving seventy-seven times can feel more like an understatement.  You may feel like you have already overlooked, brushed aside, and dished out a heaping scoop of mercy with a side of grace seventy-seven times, and it is only Tuesday!  Blended family homes provide plenty of opportunities to forgive, repeatedly.  We are all going to make mistakes and need forgiveness and grace throughout this bumpy, beautiful blended journey.  Will it be easy?  Not always.  Will it be worth it?  Absolutely!

Forgiveness begins with a choice. Not always an easy choice. But a choice that provides freedom from those tattered, dirty rags of weathered hurt and anger. A choice to break free from chains that hold you back from soaring ahead. A choice that gives way for renewed strength and fresh hope. The sweet fruit of forgiveness is an opportunity to heal, and release strongholds in your life, as well as others.

During these times of struggling to forgive and letting go, reading God’s Words can help begin to loosen those chains and soften the most unforgiving hearts:

Matthew 6:14-15 “For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”

Colossians 3:13 says: “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.

Mark 11:25 “And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.”

Ephesians 4:32 “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you”.


Heavenly Father, Thank you for Your beautiful Words that guide and instruct me on how to forgive. I confess Lord, that choosing to forgive is not always easy for me.  Please forgive me for harboring any anger towards any family members or others.  Please help me to let go and forgive (list name(s) here) for (list scenario here). Please break these unforgiving chains that bind me from having the full freedom in Christ Jesus, that you have intended for me and so freely already blessed me with. Thank you Lord, I love you! In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.


                                                                                                                     Author: Tanya Phillips

Building a Blended Home That God Desires

Deuteronomy 6

 The bible says that it took Solomon roughly 7 years to build the temple ie. “House of God.”  Solomon’s Temple (also known as the first temple) was said to have housed the Ark of the Covenant.  It was located on Mount Zion, in ancient Jerusalem.  This architecture was vast, bold, intricate, beautiful, majestic and complicated.  It was no easy feat to construct this temple; hence taking the construction crew (which consisted of thousands of workers), 7 years to build.

Just like the House of God, in Ron Deal’s book The Smart Stepfamily, it states that it takes stepfamilies 7 years to successfully “blend” our new family.  It takes time to build your family; piece by piece.  You need to begin with a strong foundation; based upon Christ, so that it cannot be broken when the pressures around us arise.  Then, little by little, through prayer, perseverance and commitment, you will begin seeing the fruits of your labor, with new memories that you create together.

My friends, begin each day by spending it with God.  Through prayer and scripture, seek God. Deuteronomy 6:5 says Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.”

 Deuteronomy 6:  Love the LORD Your God 1 These are the commands, decrees and laws the LORD your God directed me to teach you to observe in the land that you are crossing the Jordan to possess, 2 so that you, your children and their children after them may fear the LORD your God as long as you live by keeping all his decrees and commands that I give you, and so that you may enjoy long life. 3 Hear, O Israel, and be careful to obey so that it may go well with you and that you may increase greatly in a land flowing with milk and honey, just as the LORD, the God of your fathers, promised you. 4 Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one. 5 Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. 6 These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. 7 Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 8 Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads.9 Write them on the door frames of your houses and on your gates.


Lord, thank you for this family you have blessed me with.  I pray that you “blend” this family the way that YOU would have it blended.  I give you (name each family member here) and pray that these relationships be your relationships Father.  I pray that you bless us with your spirit of perseverance as we nurture and grow our new family.  I pray that you bless us with your wisdom. Thank you Lord! In Jesus’ name, Amen.

                                                                                                                                    Tanya Phillips


Blended Family Finances

 Blended families’ finances may possibly be a source of contention in the household.  The complexities that arise from previous marriages and possible past debt, to current child and/or alimony support, to disagreeing how the money should be spent, to division and possible separate bank accounts, all of these things can cause tension between our spouse and us.  Like a tug boat tied to a dock lapping against the sides of weathered deck boards from rough waters, differences in agreement regarding our finances can cause friction and wear and tear of our marriage over time.

God wants every part of us; every part of our marriage.  He wants to lead both of us spiritually, physically, mentally, emotionally, and financially.

The bible states in Matthew 12:25Jesus knew their thoughts and said to them, “Every kingdom divided against itself will be ruined, and every city or household divided against itself will not stand.”

This is a stark reality. This scripture can also apply to our financial attitudes in our homes.  God wants us to be united as a couple on all fronts, so that the devil will not be allowed a foothold in our marriage and household.

Through Christ, there is freedom from the bondage that can come from financial worry, resentment, mistrust, greed and self-seeking motives.  Therefore, my friends, have we asked God to be the Commander in Chief of our finances in our home?


Heavenly Father, You know the financial struggles [spouse’s name here] and I face.  Thank you for what you have blessed us with already in this area.  Please forgive us for any harm that we have caused each other stemming from worry, mistrust and anger in the area of our finances.  Help us forgive each other in this area.  Please guide us and bless us with Your wisdom as to how You would have us run our finances in our home, so that we are pleasing to You, and that we may have a more unified marriage and household.   Open our hearts and minds Lord so that we may hear what You have to say in the area of our finances.  We thank you Lord, in Jesus’ name, Amen.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    Tanya Phillips